…no matter how bad you may want to.
Painful life lessons are everywhere. You want to help friends and family so that they can help themselves but you can’t help them when they are only seeing what they want to see. They are willing to accept any proof they can that what they want is right so they can have it. They have to be willing to look past their own perceptions and see the truth of the situation and that is not possible when they are viewing the situation through an emotional viewpoint. They have to be willing to accept the emotional pain before they can move on and the only thing you can do is give them space to do that. You cannot change their mind or perception which is equally painful for you.
The emotional mind is the land where kids play and keep hurting themselves. Emotions are good and you should experience them but there is a time and a way to do so.
They will not accept what you say to them no matter how many times you have been right and they even admitted so many times to you in the past that you were right yet again. Sometimes, and more often than not, they want you to be wrong just this once and will convince themselves through the information given to them by another (the person at hand at that time) that they are right to believe in them and they are the innocent victim in this situation.
When someone wants you to be wrong and they want to be right they will not believe what is presented to them as the truth, and without even realizing it, their own mind that convinced them that they were innocent.
How many times have you been presented with evidence that your significant other is cheating on you from a friend? You know it is true but you are not willing to accept the truth because you don’t want to let go of your partner at the moment and so you create the false world of their truth and validate it through what they present to you as truth. This is the greatest sales job ever done on yourself and here is why.
You bought what you wanted to believe through the need to validate your own emotions and avoid pain from breaking up and moving on. So to validate your emotional needs and wants you accept what your other partner at the time tells you as logical and solid truth and rule out the variables even though you convince yourself you aren’t doing this to yourself. No one can convince you either, not even yourself.
The need to be emotionally gratified and right will always trump the logical mind because the logical mind is not giving you what you want and need and desire in the situation so you move along with your emotional mind and trick yourself through the avoidance of pain that you are making the right and logical decision and the other persons supposed evidence serves you well and you accept it as gospel truth as they say.
The sales process works the same on you as it does to another. The sales process is to make an emotional decision based on what you need and want and buy what the others are selling you and then convince yourself through their evidence that they are right and that you have made a logical decision from your emotional mind. That process of making a logical decision from an emotional mind does not work for anyone. It is like installing an elevator in an outhouse. It doesn’t belong and it doesn’t work!
Sometimes you have gifted and caring friends around you that will try and help you get out of your own way. The late and very talented Chris Farley said it best in the movie Tommy Boy: “You can get a good look at the steak by sticking your head up the cows behind but you might want to take your butchers word for it.” 🙂
Emotional training is needed in everyone’s life and the Mental Warrior Training Academy has a course that will help you control and manage your emotions and show you how to make real logical decisions and move forward in your life.